I'm going through an identity crisis.
Did I ever tell you about that one time, in therapy, when Meredith mentioned the three letters O-C-D in the same sentence as 'my anxiety'?
It's the impulse dying of hair, and the impulse spending of money I don't have, and the impulse to drink when I get bored, and the impulse need to have conversations with people about things that feel very urgent to me at very inappropriate times, and the occasional turrets when asked what I really thought about the dinner that was cooked for me, or how comfortable I was sleeping in the guest bed, or how the dog really behaved while we were watching her, or when I share my disappointment opening up a white nanopod for Christmas when I was really hoping for a black one, it is the thing that drives me to the plastic surgeons office to consider injecting poison into my face, or spending $2,000 to fix a slightly twisted tooth that no one else will ever notice is slightly twisted, it's what makes me want to plan the wedding date before the engagement and the baby before the marriage, it is the general overall need to fullfill every waking desire and need that ever crosses my mind...RIGHT AT THIS VERY MOMENT, because god forbid I wait until tomorrow or two weeks from now, or a year (the horror!)....because it will be gone, something will be missed, I will have missed the train or someone will have beaten me to the punch...the world will explode and I will be left with nothing. So I have to ACT NOW. As a result I get anxiety attacks and have chronic GAS...not like farty gas, but burpy theres a balloon stuck in my lungs kinda gas.
I am a marketers wet dream. And 'it' is the bane of my husband (to be's) existence. And this, people, is why I take Lexapro every day.
Have a good weekend ya'll!









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